this morning i had half a dream.

with many friends
old and new
but one in particular.

so in this dream we were lying together in my bed. it was early morning. maybe 5 or 6. he was up reading...or maybe writing. but he was sitting up and i was curled next to him. i woke up for a few seconds. just long enough to change positions. i put the side of my face on his stomache and closed my eyes. a few seconds later i felt him wrap his arm around me and place his open hand on the side of my face. it was heavy, but not too heavy. just warm enough. and it lay there. resting and holding at the same time. like i was something precious needing to be protected or sheltered. it was unassuming and nice. and then a few minutes later after i laid there under the weight of his hand he picked a piece of lint off my eyelash. i could see this even though i was sleeping. because thats how dreams work you see. and then he put his hand right back on my face. it was the nicest half of a dream ive ever had. because it felt so so real. i can still recover the memory of he feeling of his hand. the smoothness of it. the heat of it. the weight of it. i can close my eyes and fall in love with it. pulling my face towards him. what a strange gesture to dream up. what a strange girl i am haha. i wasnt surprised at who it was when i woke up. and just a moment ago i tried to convince myself that i should have been surprised. alas there is no should and shouldnt...just is and isnt. i need to sleep now. selah.