lets hug it out bitch.

i am slow.
i do things slowly.
time is my best friend.

you would think that people who have known me either my entire life or theirs, would understand that i rarely do anything quickly. i take my time with things, regardless of what they are. especially if i am asked to forgive or forget, i crank it down to turtle speed. its not like i NEVER do things, i just do them slowly. and im sure that this is wrong, but i feel like im "owed" the right to take my time. i dont feel like explaining that statement. even though i would just be explaining it to myself...because no one reads this, but whatever.

so i saw wedding crashers. amazing. i would absolutely ask vince vaughn to marry me...today. i always see the funniest movies with jeannine. so a couple of days ago i swore to myself that i would exercise everyday and stop eating like it was going out of style. that didnt work out well. but thats okay. im such a pseudo-motivator.

mmm...im going to get some japanese food tomorrow. i also have to work for sara tomorrow. so i'm going to need the japanese food to nourish my devil raped soul. i wouldnt mind working for sara if she paid me on time. well thats a lie, i always mind working for sara because shes not only completely insane and awkward, but i get mini panic attacks just being in her basement. and i've only proven myself to be completely irresponsible, shady and inept....yet she loves me. and i dont appreciate that.

i get mean streaks. and i get them with my dearest friends. its a terrible horrible disgusting thing. but i cant control myself. i guess you could call them mood swings, but i prefer mean streaks. its just that for whatever reason, people that im completely and genuinely crazy about start to annoy me to no end, and literally make me cringe. just a simple hello or goodbye or how are you makes my stomach turn. its so absolutely insane. i hope i can snap myself out of it...eventually.

does the oxy-clean guy really need to shout? no he fucking doesnt.

do you want me to change?
well i change for good
and i want you to know
that you'll always get your way
i wanted to say...
don't you shiver?