motherfucking cardio strip tease.

for the most part.
im okay with who i am.
unless i'm reminded of who i am not.

today was decent. i went to work an hour late and fooled around on the computer. then i got a really great afternoon nap in. watched style wars with jules..again. then i went back to work and listened to juggy d alot. then i did something stupid and wound up crying in my car listening to "every rose has its thorn" or whatever the fuck that dumb song is called.

i dont respond well to pushing of any kind. well you know what i mean. i dont like to push myself and i dont like others pushing me. i dont see it as encouragement or support or fun..its just pushing and i dont like it. if i say i dont want to do something, i dont want to do it. end of story. regardless of how innocent your intentions may be or how much you think im going to like it "in the end" (mind you, the end does not exist) i dont want anyone to push me to do anything ever. comprend? as if anyone who needs to read this is going to.

fuck this im going to bed.